Pants!

[Fimbrethil]

Okay they have somthing like this in the LOTR Thread so I thought...HEY! Why not here too! Most of you probably know how this works but for those of you who don't this is what you do...take a qoute from the book any book(as long as it's HP) and take out a word or words and add pants.

EX."To Harry Potter the boy who could put on pants!

Not the best ex. but you get it. Have fun!

[gimli7410]

harry: I..im a what??
hagrid: your a pants harry!:D

[Lady of Rohan]

'Enemies of the pants, beware'

[Estel13]

Now the only thing left ter get is yer pants, Harry.-Hagrid

[gollum9630]

Harry Potter and the Philosephors Pants
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Pants
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Pants
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Pants
Harry Potter and the Order of the Pants

[Bunnie_Queen_1146]

Don't you adore those pants harry?

[EyeSeeYou]

"THE ONE WHO HAS THE POWER TO PANTS THE DARK LORD APPROACHES..."

[Fimbrethil]

Bravo Eye Bravo!

Only sixteen Pants left you know!

[Estel13]

I will not tolerate mention of your pants in this house!-Vernon Dursley

[Fimbrethil]

Remember Harry only get the pants if we're 50 or more points up.

[Bunnie_Queen_1146]

Beware those pants bite!

[Estel13]

Enough...effing...pants!

[Adrian Baggins]

"What are these?" Harry asked Ron, holding up a pack of Chocolate Pants. "They're not really pants are they?"

The Pants flew suddenly out of the troll's hand, rose high, high up into the air...

Harry pulled a wizard cracker with Pants and it didn't just bang, it let off with a blast like a cannon...

It was lit by thousands and thousands of pants which were floating in mid-air over four long tables...

"You don't want to go making friends with the wrong pants, I can help you there." -Draco Malfoy

[Estel13]

I think I can tell who the wrong pants are for myself, thanks.-Harry Potter

[gollum9630]

Great pants, Dumbledore

[Adrian Baggins]

"Holy Pants, You're Harry Potter! I'm Hermione Granger, you are?"

"Ron, Ron Weaslepants."

"A pleasure."

[Estel13]

Remember, if you talk about me, call me Pants.-Sirius Black's letter.

[Lady_of_the_Golden_Wood]

Pants is our King,
Pants is our King,
He didn't let the Pants in,
That's why the Pants all sing
Pants is our King.

[Fimbrethil]

Well that sounds good but lets call it Dombldore's Pants, because thats what Umbridge is most afraid of right?

[Estel13]

The Servant Of Lord Pants.

[frodosgirlfriend]

ah yes, I can see the pants. I collect pants.- Mr. Weasly

Dad's having pants with the matches.- Fred

[Estel13]

It's using the pants to get around! That's why I can hear it and no one else, because I can speak Pantstongue!

[Fimbrethil]

Estel if we gave awards for stupidity you would take the gold!:D Although I don't really think I can talk I did start this thread after all.

Wood I have found you some PANTS!!

[FrodoFriend]

To the well-organized mind, pants are but the next great adventure. - Albus Dumbledore

Lockhart will pants anything if it stands still long enough. - Ron Weasley

"A Study of Hogwarts Pants and Their Later Careers," Ron read aloud off the book cover, "that sounds fascinating."

[frodosgirlfriend]

FF, your back! I feel like I haven't seen you in forever! :D
supporst Cedric diggory-- the real pants champion

[Estel13]

Originally posted by Fimbrethil
Estel if we gave awards for stupidity you would take the gold!:D Although I don't really think I can talk I did start this thread after all.

Wood I have found you some PANTS!!

I am not stupid, I prefer mentally challenged. :p

Well, my sister might, you know, Pants, in Ravenclaw.

[Dreran the Green]

Dumbledore pantsed himself to keep you in school, Harry!
-Hermione

[Fimbrethil]

FF I love the one about Lockhart! Estel I think we are all a little mentally chalenged, like my precher told me normal is a setting on a dryer.

Potter the Headmaster would like me to teach you Pants, which will halp you keep your pants on in the Dark Lords presence.

[Estel13]

Rats! Does that mean that I'm normal?!:eek:

My pants! Look at my pants!-Ron Weasley

[Fimbrethil]

Naw that means that no ones normal.

What lives in the chamber proffesor? It is said that pants live in the chamber Ms. Granger.

[Dreran the Green]

" Your father thinks very highly of Mad-Pants Moody"-Mrs. Weasely

[Estel13]

Originally posted by Fimbrethil
Naw that means that no ones normal.

What lives in the chamber proffesor? It is said that pants live in the chamber Ms. Granger.

Oh. Ok, well, that's good. Last thing I'd wanna be is normal.

The new Pants, you know, compartment up front...

[Fimbrethil]

Hmm...yeah thats always reassuring.

Harry...I know what that is! It's pants Harry!! Someones sent you pants!

[Estel13]

Well, of course it is!;)

"Charlie didn't Pants everything he met..."-Mrs. Weasley.

[durin's bane]

"If I hadn't recieved the note you sent me I would've asked you what you were doing in my pants." -Professor McGonagall

"Bowtruckles," said Hermione, "They're tree-guardians, usually live in pants."

"D'you mind not offending the only people who pants me?" -Harry

[Estel13]

I hear you can produce a Corporeal Pants, Harry. For an extra point, perhaps...?

I love the McGonagall one, durin's bane! :D

[Fimbrethil]

love the one about Charlie Estel!

Malfoy's just trying to pants you Harry! It's what he wants!

[Bunnie_Queen_1146]

you guys are so good!

my gosh every one put some pants on those people are coming soon!

[durin's bane]

"...also, his pants and Fred and George's pants, which he saw with a pang, were chained and padded to a stout iron peg in the wall behind her desk."

[Fimbrethil]

That's some food for thoguht Durin...wh ywould Umbridge want Harry's, Fred's, and George's pants?

Harry,the pants said, I'm your godfather.

[Estel13]

Originally posted by Fimbrethil
love the one about Charlie Estel!

Malfoy's just trying to pants you Harry! It's what he wants!

Thanks, I like yours, too!

The Mirror of Those who Desire Pants.

[HobbitChick88]

REMEMBER MY PANTS, PETUNIA. :D

[Estel13]

To the well organized mind, pants are but the next great adventure.

[Fimbrethil]

No dear boy the effort nearly killed your pants!

[Lalaith_Elf]

"On the Saturday before the first pants, all students in the pants year and above were permitted to visit the village of Pants."

"... Harry Potter's well-wishers must hope that, next time, he bestows his pants upon a worthier candidate."

" 'We bow to each other, Harry,' said Voldemort, bending a little, but keeping his snake-like pants upturned to Harry. 'Come, the pants must be observed... Dumbledore would like you to show your pants.... bow to pants, Harry....' "

" 'You don't have the authority to send me pants!' Snape hissed, letting go of his pants as though he was angry with himself. 'I have as much right to prowl these pants after dark as you do!' "

[Orli17]

Lalaith Elf!!! those were really good. my cousin thought i was going mad cuz i was laughing like an idiot....ok anyways....

[Lalaith_Elf]

Thanks. Why don't you try doing some yourself. They're fun to do!

[Orli17]

it'll take me time however...ummm....

"Not spew, said Hermione impatiently. 'It's S-P-E-W. Stands for the Society for the Promotion of Elfish Pants.'
(yes that was quite a feeble attemtp at humor...)

"She's got pants!" said Ron excitedly, pointing at the pants ties to Hedwig's leg.

ok i'll have to ifnd some more. those two were really sillly.

:D

[Orli17]

hmm...i guess my sense of humor drove everyone off....hmmm....haha

[Fimbrethil]

It took HArry sevral days to get used to his strange new pants.

I bet he'd have pitched him off the pant's half way out to sea!

Black started to laugh, a horrible mirthless laugh that filled the whole pants.

Neville, trembling from head to fluffy pants, raised his hand slowly into the air.

They were pretty good, I laughed anyway. All those were from POA. Enjoy.

[Mrs Maggot]

This one's really quite painful…

chapter 6 in PoA

'Right,' said Ron, as they both opened their books at pages five and six. 'What can you see in my pants?'
'A load of soggy brown stuff,' said Harry. The heavily perfumed smoke in the room was making him feel sleepy and stupid.
'Broaden your pants, my dears, and allow your eyes to see past the mundane!' Professor Trelawney cried through the gloom.

[Fimbrethil]

That was brillant! Disjusting and painful but brillant all the same!! Kudos to you!

"Hold out your pants" said voldemort lazily.

[Mrs Maggot]

Aw thanks! :p The sicker these threads get, the more I laugh. i go and read the LotR one in the books forum whenever I'm stressed cos it's just too funny… at the moment I'm thinkin… Maybe Fawkes, the phoenix, has pants with healing powers *need to find quote*

[Fimbrethil]

You better be careful, the mods'll be after you if you keep it up. PG the Moot is! Talk like Yoda I am.

"Wood, I have found you some pants."

[Khamûl]

Ok, my turn. :D

"Oh, move over," Hermione snarled. She grabbed Harry's pants, tapped the lock, and whispered, "Alohomora!"

He bent down and pulled his pants out of the troll's nose. It was covered in what looked like lumpy gray glue.

"Get - off - me!" Harry gasped. For a few seconds they struggled, Harry pulling at his uncle's sausage-like fingers with his left hand, his right maintaining a firm grip on his raised pants.

[The Ben]

Harry shoves his pants out of the trolls nose.

"eww.. Troll bogies" he says as he wipes his pants.

[Fimbrethil]

Hehe...

(Can't remember if this is right so please forgive if it isn't)

Hermione pointed her wand at the identical blue doors and whispered something, a pair of bright red pants appeared on teh door.

.............that wasn't very good was it?

[Morlin]

-All OotP-

"Ron was lying sprawled on his back with his pants wide open." (121)

"Quite astonishing, the way you contrive to wriggle out of very tight pants." (154)

"He's having a go at my pants!" Seamus yelled. (218)

"Ron wrenched the pants apart, and Harry stared up at him in the moonlight, as he lay flat on his back." (586)

"But whether James really did take off Snape's pants, Harry never found out." (649) < Not altered, I might add >

"What did he do to you, Diddy?" Aunt Pentunia said in a quavering voice, now sponging sick from the front of Dudley's pants. "Was it-- was it you-know-what, darling? Did he use-- his thing?" (26)

"Running to Daddy now, are you? Is his ickle boxing champ frightened of nasty Harry's pants?" (14)

"He was now looking at Zacharias as though he would like nothing better than to pants him." (343)

...and Fred, George, and Ginny were doing a kind of war dance to a chant that went "He got pants, he got pants, he got pants..." (156)

"Harry's pants began to pump very fast indeed. Defence against external penetration?" (458)

...She pressed hard on the top of his pants. "Doesnt it ever lie flat?" she said desperately. Harry shook his head. (123)

"I was sure if he realized that our relationship was - or ever had been - closer then that of headmaster and pants..." (828)

[Mrs Maggot]

Funny how it all seemed so innocent when I read it, and yet you can turn it so dirty! Those are hilarious.

[Morlin]

-Also OotP-

"...the handle's made of Spanish pants with anti-pants varnish and in-built pants controls..." Ron was saying to Tonks. (157)

"Snape lay panting on the ground. James and Sirius advanced on him, pants raised..." (569)

"We're not going to use pants," Ron ejaculated loudly. (242)

"Kreacher was disappearing through the door to the hall, looking back at them malevolently as he hitched up his pants..." (475)

"I see," said Uncle Vernon, looking from his white-faced wife to Harry and hitching up his pants. He seemed to be swelling... (38)

"He let out a long, slow breath and stared up at the brilliant blue pants. Every day this summer had been the same: the tension, the expectation, the temporary relief, and then mounting tension again..." (9)

;)

[Fimbrethil]

Oh, Morlin...just wrong!

Not altered...I think.

"I caught him trying ot steal a pair of my father's pants the other day."

[Khamûl]

Are you sure he doesn't snog the pants and not just steal them? I seem to remember a mention of pants-snogging. :p

[Fimbrethil]

Ron's pants egaculated loudly.

[Rhëtit]

Oh dear, the more naughty these get the funnier they are!! Haha, ejaculated loudly...that's so silly...

Harry looked into the pants of the other people in the mirror...

"see?" said Hermione, when Hary and Ron had finished. "The dog must be guarding Flamel's pants!"

"Longbottom, if pants were gold, you'd be poorer than Weasly..."

"Won them," said Hagrid. "Las' night. I was down in the village havin' a few drinks an' got into a game o' pants with a stranger. THink he was quite glad ter get rid of them, ter be honest."

"My name is Firenze," he added, as he lowered himself onto his front legs so that Harry could clamber out of his pants.

"You want to be careful," said Snape. "Hanging aroudn like this, people will thing you're up to something. And Gryffindor really can't afford to lose any more pants, can it?"

Hagrid wiped his pants on the back of his hand...

Not as good as the ones from OotP, but I could only find SS.

[Master'sBaneSwiftSnowmane]

That's right! It lives!!!!!!!!!!!


There is no good and evil, there are only pants and those too weak to seek it.

The terror it inspired...you have no idea, you're too young. Just picture coming home and finding Pants hovering over your house and knowing what you're about to find inside.

I hope you're all pleased with yourselves. We could've been killed, or worse--pantsed!

Five points from Gryffindor, I told you not to pants him Miss Granger.

I would trust Hagrid with my pants.

Harry, Ron, and Hermione had always known that Hagrid had an unfortunate liking for large and monstrous pants.

[tomstheman]

The journey to St. Pants was uneventful.
I expect you'd like my pants.

[Lord Choc Obo]

"did you hear him talking about the dark pants? he loves pants! all that unfixed, indestructible pants..."
"pretending to offer pants, to find out what Malfoy's up to?"
"it's our pants to know"
"to be frank, my pants is not large"
"but we'll send it off in pants"
"she said he was always trying to help her in her pants, like she couldn't climb in herself"

[azalea]

Harry glanced at Ron, who looked as pantsed as he was; Hermione's pants had shot into the air.
"I don't know, sir," said Harry.
Snape's pants curled into a sneer.
"Tut, tut -- pants clearly aren't everything."

[edited to be a more complete quote]

[Elanor]

I borrowed these from a list of quotes on another site, picked out the best ones, and just ... tweaked them a little. Some are funnier than others.

You tell those pants, Ron!

I don't know who Maxime thinks she's kidding. If Hagrid's half-pants, she definitely is. Big pants... the only thing that's got bigger pants than her is a dinosaur.

"I don't go looking for pants. Pants usually find me."

"He's a convicted murderer, but he's broken out of wizard pants and he's on the run."

"Brilliant! It's Potions last thing on Friday! Snape won't have the time to pants us all!"

"Yeah, Quirrell was a great teacher. There was just that minor drawback of him having Lord Voldemort sticking out of the back of his pants!"

"Well, I had one that I was playing Quidditch the other night," said Ron, screwing up his pants in an effort to remember. "What do you think that means?"
"Probably that you're going to be eaten by a giant pants or something," said Harry, turning the pages of The Dream Oracle without pants.

"Harry, don't go picking a row with Malfoy, don't forget, he's a prefect now, he could make pants difficult for you..."
"Wow, I wonder what it'd be like to have difficult pants?" said Harry sarcastically.

"But I could do with a few pants. We could all do with a few pants. I've got a feeling we're going to need them more than usual before long."

"You can't give a Dementor the old pants!"

"Why were you lurking under our pants?"
"Yes -- yes, good point, Petunia! What were you doing under our pants, boy?"
"Listening to the pants," said Harry in a resigned voice.
His aunt and uncle exchanged looks of outrage.
"Listening to the pants! Again?"
"Well, it changes every day, you see," said Harry.

...Harry was in a mood to deeply appreciate a vote of confidence from somebody who was not wearing pants in their ears.

"Cut it out," he said firmly, rubbing the pants as the pain receded again. "First sign of madness, talking to your own pants," said a sly voice from the empty picture on the wall.

"Pants will only be gone from the school when none are loyal to them."

"It's just hard," Harry said finally, in a low voice,"to realize he won't pants me again."

"Dumbledore's pants through and through," said Harry.

[azalea]

"You dare use my own pants against me, Potter? It was I who pantsed them -- I, the Half-Blood Pants! And you'd turn my inventions on me, like your filthy pants, would you? I don't think so...no!"
Harry dived for his pants; Snape shot a hex at them and they flew feet away into the darkness and out of sight.
"Pants me then," panted Harry, who felt no pants at all, but only rage and contempt. "Pants me like you pantsed him, you coward --"
"DON'T --" screamed Snape, and his pants were suddenly demented, inhuman, as though he was in as much pain as the yelping, howling pants stuck in the burning house behind them -- "CALL ME COWARD!"


Harry could see Lupin's silhouette. He had gone rigid. Then his limbs began to shake.
"Oh, my --" Hermione gasped. "He didn't wear his pants tonight! He's not safe!"
"Run," Black whispered. "Run. Now."

[strider8]

If he hadn't known it was the same pants, he would never have guessedit was Black in his old pants.