House of Hilarity: It's Part Time

[klatukatt]

Read the title however you like, but what it means is I am sick of all the plotting going on in current RPGs. What ever happened to the days of pie throwing and miremnivore in the oven?

So, here in the newly created House of Hilarity feel free to go wild. The drinks are free, and you can bring whoever you want.

(For insparation see this site (http://dooku.net/) and click the white bar twice, then WATCH and LISTEN.)

~~~~~

*Katt, the hostess, surveyed the buffet. It was laden with more sugar and chocolate than it was possibly healthy to eat. She checked the lock on the drinks cabinet, made sure the key was easily accessable, then turned on the neon sign that dominated the roof of the house.*

House of Hilarity
PARTY TONIGHT

Katt: That should be a good invitation.

*Katt unlocked the back door and turned on the lights that lit the path up to the front porch.*

Katt: Music, music, music...

*Katt decided to start out with The Two Towers soundrack because she had no idea who'd be coming, and wanted something they could all aggree on.*

Katt: It's party time.

[rohirrim TR]

hey, maybe the EMPIRE could take over middle earth, sounds like a party to me :evil:

[rohirrim TR]

*puts Switchfoot, The beutiful letdown, in cd player, *

*lotesse runs away screaming* :D :D

*curub walks in and replaces switchfoot with relient K* :D :D

*many others follow Lotesse, running and screaming, exaclty the way DR. Hector told them to* :D :D

[Curubethion]

I can't let that happen again...
Cause then you'll see my heart
In the saddest state it's ever been.

This is no place
To try and live my life

Ahh, forget that.

When I look at the stars,
When I look at the stars,
When I look at the stars,
I see Someone Else.
:D

[rohirrim TR]

ahh yes "nothing is sound" good album


btw curubethion- are you coming to that concert in dodge city?

[Curubethion]

Dodge City? What? Where? How? When?
:D It's a pretty far jaunt for us Wichitans.

[Earniel]

Stay on topic please.

[Finrod Felagund]

This reminds me of the Old Entmooters Parties...there were three of them, I hosted the third...and they were awesome.

[Embladyne]

*Em sees a bright neon sign pop up over the last hill of her nightly walk. As she draws closer, she can finally begin to read the letters:* "H-O-U-S-E-O-F-H-I-L-A-R-I-T-Y....P-A-R-T-Y-T-O-N-I-G-H-T."
*She ponders the meaning of the mysterious symbols, but decides to check the house with the sign out, since it seems as though there's a party going on inside.*

*Stepping through the door, Em is bombarded with music from TTT. Humming along, she looks around and sees some punch and cake sitting on a table. The house is pretty deserted at the moment, but free food is always a plus in Em's reasoning so she picks up a fork and a plate.*

[klatukatt]

Katt: Hey, Finrod! Good to see you. You used to throw some crazy parties, man. *tosses him some mirivor* Treat this house like it was your own.

[rohirrim TR]

ahh the hostess *doffs cap* are you by chance the one with the ability to attack someone with an exploding penguin, or do you have a potato pealer/ninja abilities? at anyrate great party, good music, and i ordered some pizza.

[Curubethion]

IMPROMPTU RAP TIME!!!

Yo, it's Big C
With that bling bling izzle.
Wassup tonight
Cause it's Big C izzle!'

:D :D

[Embladyne]

*Em is caught off guard by the mad rapping skillz of "Big C izzle" and almost chokes on her cake.*

"Nice, erm, singing there. Yes, very nice. Know any more?"

*She gulps down some punch and prepares for a new blasting of her eardrums.*

[Finrod Felagund]

Finrod: Katt...its been a while since we partied together...really long...By the way, any Lembas around here?

[rohirrim TR]

You da man Bic C, is is my turn o what yo?

yo its rohirrim here
i'm gonna bring ya'll near
yeah yeah and then you'll hear
an what i say is free an clear

[Curubethion]

Not bad...you'll have to come up with a good name though... :D Thanks to BB for the name "Big C"...which was the inspiration for my little tune...

Anyone else want to show their skills? :D

[rohirrim TR]

cool its like "entmoot idol" :D

[klatukatt]

Katt: We got everything. Just look in the fridge. *to Rohirrim TR* Yes, I have exploding penguins. They are in the bathroom, so be careful.

*Katt climbs on to the impromptu stage in the center of the living room*

Katt: Moot! Thank yall for coming, so all yall got to get up here and strut yo' stuff! Take it back Big C!

*Katt wanders off into the kitchen to unlock the lickor cabinet*

[The last sane person]

*Sane walks in and bonks KlatuKatt with her spelling hammer*

Sane: It's Liquor...And I will take some, thank you. *reaches past a stunned Katt adn grabs some Jonny Walker for starters*

[Lady Marion Magdalena]

*Grabs some port and Sane's arm*

Lady M.: Hello darling, I believe you owe me a dance.

[Rían]

*grabs some starboard - er, port - and Sane's other arm*

[Rían]

Hey, Lady M, I was just reading an article about cheerleading and those acrobatic tosses they do ...

and how they have a really high injury rate ... but hey, this is an rpg!

Let's see how high we can toss Sane!

*cheers* We love Tolkien,
Yes we do!
We love Tolkien,
How 'bout YOU?

*lady M and Rian toss Sane waaaaaay up into the air and watch her with interest*

Sane: aaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!

*Katt calls Rian and Lady M over to discuss the liquor cabinet contents. They all peer into the cabinet and get into a heated discussion*

Sane : Hey!?!?!

[Lady Marion Magdalena]

Lady M.: I think we'd better catch her. She's breakable you know.

*They grab a blanket and stretch it out, Sane lands in the middle and bounces.*

Rian: Bouncy too apparently.

Lady M.: We're gonna get seriously pounced for this...

Sane: *still bouncing* D*mn right!

[Rían]

*Rian, who had the lousy idea in the first place, turns herself into a leopard gecko and climbs up the wall and across the ceiling and onto the ceiling fan, where she throws marshmallows down on the people below*

*Sane and Lady M get some interesting ideas*

[The last sane person]

*And thus Maggie and Sane invent the Marshmellow CANNON. And lo, they did grin evilly.*

*The start grabbing the fallen marshmellows, sticking them in the CANNON.*

Maggie: FIRE...Er....Marshmellow!

*and the CANNON did go BOOOOM*

Katt: Ah! Its the State Puff Marshmellow Man!! Not only that, but no one gets this refference! AAAAAAAH!

*and so she did scream, and so did many others, for they were all showered with molten-marshmellow goo*

Sane: AHA! One foe down! Maggie to go! *For, indeed, Rian the Gecko was all but glued to the wall*

RianGecko: Hrrrn! *tries to lift leg, which promptly re-glues itself to the nearest bit of wall*

*And Sane did grin*

Maggie: Meeps... *edges away*

*But Sane did not notice, for she was too drunk on GLORY and REVENGE! (well, more like some good scotch...but we will let that slide, seeing her mood), that said she wasnt functioning in the headgasket all that well*

Maggie: *thinks up a distraction* Er, well, you still do owe me that dance!

Sane: HAVE AT THEE-! What? Oh? I do? Huh, how's that? *and amidst the gooey wreckage of the House of Hilarity (which the people didnt mind at all, since it was all edible) they start to dance*

[The last sane person]

Stupid Page Bug!

[The last sane person]

OOC: This is Katt, who is too full of SLOTH to change usernames. (she is a staying with me! Mario!)

Katt: *her eyes filling with a strange fire* This gives me baaaaaad ideas... *she suddenly wakes up* No! Maestro! A tango!

I ache for the touch of your lips dear,
but much more for the touch of your whips dear,
You can raise welts, like nobody else
as we dance to the Masochism Tango!

Katt: Pikatchu! Please don't sue! (Another refrence no one gets!) TIME FOR WINE!

(good wine, mind you, this time. None of that cheap Merlot.)

Rian: *grumbles* If anyone orders Merlot I'm leaving. I'm not drinking any &$&!ing MERLOT!

Sane: leave? you've hardly come un-glued! need some help?

Rian: No, I was just caught up in the moment... and marshmallows.

*Katt came dancing out of the kitchen with all her little minions following her carrying bottles of wine--*

Katt: Not the minions as in five-year-olds, I mean Glordifle.....and all my OTHER husbands.

*Okay, now that that is cleared up: There was Yellow Tail Shiraz, Sweet Cheryl to go with the Marshmallows, Pino Noir, Pino Gresio, and a bunch of home brewed fruit wine she bought from the archer at Camlann.*

Katt: How does THAT grab you, wine lovers?

*When the guests had drunk their fill (or at least, all the wine was gone) Katt yelled:*

Katt: TIME FOR WOMEN!

Maggie: Don't be ridiculous. We have five Women here and three Men, not counting your "minions", though I don't know if they count. We'll have none of that.

Sane: Aw.....How about "Either/Or?"

Maggie: NO! *glares at Sane*

Sane: *wilts* fine....

Katt: Oh, um, all right then. TIME FOR SONG! I'll go first.

*It was karoke style, including the bad singing.*

Katt: Stars shining bright above you
night breezes seem to whisper "I love you"
birds singing in the sycamore tree
Dream a little Dream of Me...

Sane: *wrings out ears* good lord....and this is from a person who CAN sing....*fears what hideous concotion the "rappers" will come up with*

Katt: All right, who's next? Sane? I see you back there!

Sane:****.... well, least this stalls the rappers....

OOC: A cookie (or nookie) for anyone that gets the various movie references (and one old TV show that I don't expect anyone to get).

[The last sane person]

OOC:

ARG!!! Stupid page bug AGAIN!

Katt: Wait, what the hell is a "nookie"?

[Rían]

Rian : Why, it means *whips out her Elvish entymologies*

Ahem : "Nookie" is a word in the dialect of Gondolin that means to, well, YOU KNOW!, derived from [Q] "No-", beget, and [Q] "Kay", lie down. :D

*with apologies to JRRT*

*I kid you not, those words are in the entymologies!*

[rohirrim TR]

well that was interesting, i don't understand why the exploding penguins didn't get funky with all of that going on...oh well perhaps you will think of it next time. in the mean time lets rap

why ya'll fight
it ain't quite right
no matter how much might
you still gone come night

well i'm no pacifist
but i don't use my fist
or a shopping list
yo could use a sierra mist

top that big C :D :D

[Lady Marion Magdalena]

Lady M.: Noooooooooo!!!

*Pulls out the Frying Pan of Dooooooom and smites the bringer of painful ryhmes*

Katt: Quick! A drinking song!

Lady M: A drinking song?

Katt: Yes!

Lady M: But which?

Katt: In the year of our lord 1800 and six
we set sail from the fair cove of cork-

Katt & Lady M: We were sailin' away with a cargo of bricks
for the grand city hall in New york!

*They continue to sing, loudly, and slightly off key.*

Sane: *groans* Not the drinking songs...

[klatukatt]

Katt: Then why don't you drink instead of sing?

*Katt produces a bottle of Jack Daniels from the hidden compartment in the sofa, tosses it to Sane and continues the song.*

What a wonderful craft
She was rigged fore and aft
And oh how the wild winds drove her
She withstood seven blasts
She had twenty-seven masts
And we called her the IRISH ROVER!

*At this Katt fell to her knees doing an impression of a rock and roll guitarist. Lady M gave her a Look.*

Katt: Oh, are we not doing that version? Oh well.

We had one million bags of the best sligo rags...

*And so on and so forth.*

[Lady Marion Magdalena]

*Several minutes later...*

Katt & Lady M.: *at the top of their lungs* I'M THE LAST OF THE IRISH ROOOOVER!!!

[The last sane person]

*at which point Sane had joined in the singing, forcing jack daniels down Lady M's throat*

Sane: Coom on lass, get some fire in yous! Drinky Drinky! *and she did stumbly off to the side, and Lady M, being the featherweight that she is, stumbled right after*

[Rían]

(um, just wanted to make clear that "Nookie" is NOT in the entymologies, but the root words are!)

*builds a fireplace and a fire and roasts some marshmallows*

Rian: Have some, maties? Arrrrr! Avast and all that!!

[Lady Marion Magdalena]

Lady M: Hey! No need to use force! I like whiskey, remember?

Sane: You're still a featherweight.

Lady M: *glares, grabs bottle, determined to prove Sane wrong*

[rohirrim TR]

*put Pillar in CD Player*
you can't bring me down
do you hear what i'm tryn t say
you can't bring me down
i'm not gonna walk away

[The last sane person]

Sane: Really? I thought it was port...eh...featherweight like you, doesnt matter much!

Lady M.: Grrr....*puts down a shot* Oh...we'll see about tha!

*Sane chuckles as she sees Lady M's cheeks get rosey colored*

Sane: Indeed we will! *downs two shots of whiskey for M's one*

[Rían]

*RÃ*an peers through her gecko eyes at the others*

"Oh, rats, what's all this sticky stuff on me? I think I'll molt!"

*sheds her skin and turns back into a human, forgetting she's still on the ceiling fan*

*falls to the floor*

*bounces up*

"Hey, you guys, what's this whisky stuff? That's for wimps! Try some of the REAL stuff - marshmallow margaritas!"

*hands glasses all around*

[The last sane person]

Sane: Oh, that's just gross! And whiskey works just fine, Maggie can't handle anything more than that.

Rian: Humph....

[Acalewia]

*Acalewia walks in with several large pizzas*
Did I hear somebody say Jack Daniels?

[The last sane person]

Lady M: you ost certain did! *hiccup*

Sane: Pile them pizzas over here and pour yourself a shot!

[rohirrim TR]

mmm pizza
*cranks up some switchfoot for atmosphere*

[Lady Marion Magdalena]

Lady M: How d'you know I can't handle more'n whiskey? I've never hand- had a chance to try. Stupid illogical drinking age laws...

Sane: Exactly. See, you're drunk already.

Lady M: Am not!

*grabs bottle and drains it.*

Lady M: Now I'm drunk!

Sane: Drunker. You should be falling down about now.

*They wait. Lady M sways, but stays on her feet.*

Sane: Huh?

Lady M: *grins* It's a role play, normal laws of inebriation ran away a long time ago.

Sane: Oh yeah...

[The last sane person]

Sane: you've had chances, but you've always beena prude!

Lady M: Like when?

Sane: Like when at my house, at Mango's house or at Klatukatt's house....Only because this is an rpg that you arent falling down, and even then....*eyes gleam*

Lady M: meeps!

Sane: I AM NINJA! *POUNCE*

[rohirrim TR]

*rummages through cabinent*
hey! why is the rum gone? *a la jack sparrow*

[Lady Marion Magdalena]

*Lady M retaliates with a Third degree Cuddle*

Sane: No... don't try that. Cuteness shall not save thee!

Lady M: *purrs*

Sane: Oh, fine then.

[The last sane person]

Sane: Must...Resist...the...CUTENESS! Nggh!

Lady M: *cuddles* hehe, you shall fall! It works like a charm every time!

Sane:....nyarg! *collapses and gives in, turns into a big ole cat and flops in Lady M's lap, purring for cuddles*

Sane: Ah...Human women.... Nothing more infuriating or gratfying. *is tamed by the hand of maggie*

[rohirrim TR]

ok then, but why is the rum gone!??

[klatukatt]

Katt: Look, the rum isn't gone, I just put it where you can't find it. Garçon?

*There came waddling out of the kitchen a large penguin with a yellow bowtie.*

Finrod: Gah! It's an explodie! Duck!

Katt: Relax. Garçon, holen Sie das spezielle Getränk, vom Spatzen.

Sane: Hey, where did you learn German?

Katt: As they say, this is a role play. Ich bin vom Wunder voll.

*The penguin came back and gave Katt a half-full unmarked bottle. She tossed it to rohirrim TR*

Katt: I think you'll find that satisfactory.

rohirrim TR: But, its... its... green.

Katt: And well it fits.

[The last sane person]

Sane: snerk...Hey, Katt, is that a quote in your sig, from the other day with me, Ian and you in the car?

[Acalewia]

*grabs a bottle of JD*
Acalewia: This should seperate the Women from the Girls
*Starts dancing around singing Whiskey Girl* :D

[The last sane person]

Sane: technically speaking here, I can vouch for Rian, Katt, myself and Lady M, that we are indeed all women, no girls. Only person we dont know that about is you! *Grins and downs vodka*

[rohirrim TR]

* uncomfortable silence*
rTR: that killed conversation,hmm lets see, *cranks up Pillar HYPNOTIZE*

where do we go from here?
how did it dissapear?
its hard to see with our own eyes, these lies
we've been hypnotized....

[Acalewia]

*Acalewia downs the whole bottle*
Vodka is not my style, Sane.
*Grabs another bottle*

[Acalewia]

Acalewia: Hey Kat! Got any Carribean Rum?
:D

[klatukatt]

Katt: Yes, Sane, that is your quote. I love it.

*Katt pulls out two more bottles of rum and a bottle of gin. These get passed around rather quickly.*

Katt: You guys are going to drink me out.

Sane: Ah, shut your face. We know you just installed a bottomless liquor cabinet.

Katt: *sighs* All right. *throws the key into the lock* There you go. Have at it.

*While many MANY bottles get pulled out of the cabnet, Katt gets out a martini shaker and makes a sour apple martini.*

Katt: You guys just want to get drunk. You have no respect for the finer tastes.

Lady M: *kindly* Katt, you're drinking Pucker.

Katt: Well, at least it's mixed with gin.

*A couple hundred drinks later (about 20 minutes) most of the guests were... "relaxed" on the floor.*

Katt: I wanna play Risk. Does anyone want to play Risk with me?

Everyone else: NO! *throws pillows at Katt*

[rohirrim TR]

Risk *ears perk up* why such a hostile reaction to such a great game?
I'd love to play risk, all we need is 4 people, *even more pillows start flyin in my direction*

[Curubethion]

I'm in for RISK! I will conquer the world!!! Muahahaha!!
*Pillows continue to fly*

[rohirrim TR]

YES! all we need is one more person and-*coughs on a feather that gets stuck in throat* acch! too many feathers here for RISK lets go to the back room.
Katt: umm, well there are uhh..penguins housed in the backroom
LSP:NOOO! RUN FOR THE HILLS
Me: oh, well what about the front room?

[klatukatt]

LSP: How many rooms does this place have?

Katt: I don't know.

Rohirrim: You know what this means...

All 3: A QUEST FOR BURIED TREASURE!

*These three jump up and go to a nearbye supply closet for flashlights. Why do they need flashlights, you ask? Because 20 seconds later the power went out, leaving the rest of the drunken, content party-goers in the dark.*

[Lady Marion Magdalena]

Lady M.: *rambling, but that's okay, cause she's just a little tipsy* I'd play Risk with you, but it's probably better if I don't. I tend to get too competetive and throwing dice at the other players when they try to attack really isn't-

Hey... where'd the lights go? Sane? Kitty? Oh fuzz...

*wanders off to find her questing friends*

[rohirrim TR]

me: *switches flash light on, zzzz,* whoa, a lightsaber, i wondered where i put the yellow one, now i know.

[klatukatt]

Katt: Hey, you ever noticed how there are no black or white lightsabers? As if we are supposed to just KNOW that the bad guys are RED and the good guys are GREEN.

[rohirrim TR]

darth rohirrous:elementary wats-err katt, evil is determined by POV, the lightsaber isn't evil its just a tool, you might say "lightsabers don't kill people, force users with lighsabers kill people". :evil: as to color being a factor, well as i always say, to me the JEDI are evil. mwa mwa mwamawa :evil:

[Acalewia]

Acalewia: *rolls her eyes at rTR's ramblings* No more rum for you, dude. So what are we suposed to be looking for excatly?

[rohirrim TR]

Me: I have no idea, looking for Risk players i guess....

[klatukatt]

Katt: Actually, I've heard rumors of a Star Wars Risk Set made up entirely of precious jewels! Maybe it's hiding in this house!!!

Rohhirim: SWEET!

Acalewia: Let's split up!

Lady M: Wait! That sounds like a really bad--

*WOOSH!*

Lady M: idea...

*Only Lady M and Sane were left in the living room.*

[The last sane person]

*sane has a maniacal grin on her face...*

Sane: Ninja time, on all those unexpecting people in a dark house....*sneaks up and righteously pounces on maggie, who really freaks out, then leaps away* one down....

[rohirrim TR]

Darth Rohhirous: *senses a shadowtrooper, with a twisted sense of humor*
Sane: BOOOO! *zzzz, red lightsaber appears in the darkness*
*the lights come back on*
Sane: dang it! it was just getting to the good part. *lights go off*

[The last sane person]

Darth Sane: *lights go off* Goody! Have at thee! only no chopping of the limbs or head!

Darth Rohhirous: Sure thing...! But how are we supposed to know where eachother's heads and corresponding body parts are?

Darth Sane: Er...Use the force?

Darth Rohhirous: Oh! Right o then!

*whack!* *whack!* *clash!* *boom!* *crashing of a china cabinet*

Darth Rohhirous: Oh shoot. Darth KlatuKattus is gonna kill us if we break anything.

Darth Sane: You are probably right...but its two on one...we can take her, or at least run like the dickens.

*they pause and share a look, which was kinda hampered cause they were in the dark*

Katt: *comes in and shines flashlight on the two sith*

*Sane and Rohhirous swiftly hide their light sabers behind their backs*

Darth Sane: poops

[klatukatt]

Katt: Did you break that cabnet?

Sane and Rohhirous: No.

Katt: Are you sure?

Sane and Rohhirous: Yes.

Katt: You broke it?

Sane and Rohhirous: No.

Katt: So it broke on it's own.

Sane and Rohhirous: Yes.

Katt: You are positive you didn't break it.

Sane and Rohhirous: Yes.

Katt: So you broke it.

Sane and Rohhirous: Yes.

Katt: Come on, guys, we're all part of the EDDIE team, let's work together. *Pulls out blaster* I don't want to have to get you re-encarnated. It's so much work.

Sane: Aw, don't threaten ME, woman.

Katt: Then just step away from the cabinet.

*Sane and Rohhirous step out of the flashlight beam and run away to fight elsewhere. Katt looks at the broken cabinet and shoots it.*

Katt: Wah ha ha!!!!!!! *runs off*

[Acalewia]

Acalewia: *Ducks as Sane and rTR begin dueling again* Hey watch it! I'd like to keep my head and other body parts! *Runs tp a corner to watch* Sheesh! Kids and their lightsabers

[rohirrim TR]

Darth rohirrous: *dueling* ehh, who needs a china cabinet anyway, i mean come on....
Darth Sane: i want a liger...
Darth rohirrous: ligers aren't chinese
Darth sane: so?
Darth rohirrous:so uhh...yeah you can't get one in china i guess, but katt's china cabinet was made in china.
Darth Sane: it can't be, she should be supporting the american woodworkers of uhh whatever state has woodworkers.
Darth rohirrous: you could boycott her licker cabinet...
Darth Sane: *horrified look*
Darht Rohirrous: ...or not... whoa! *trips on terrified penguin who is having a nightmare about ligers*

[Acalewia]

Holy s***! Run! *Acalewia disappears in a very elf like fashion*

[klatukatt]

*The penguin wakes up, but the lights are still out so it starts getting very agitated.*

Katt: *Runs toward them* DUCK AND COVER!

*Everyone dives out of the way and Katt kicks the penguin out of a widow.*

BOOOOM

Katt: *Stands up* Now, what was this you were saying about my liquor cabinet?

[Acalewia]

Acalewia: *peeks in* that was close!
*turns to the others*
yeah what about a liquor cabenit?

[Lady Marion Magdalena]

Lady M: Why did the lights go out anyway?

*goes and fiddles with all the likely looking wires she can find till the lights come back on, revealing Katt standing over Sane and Rohirrous who are locked in semi-mortal combat*

Lady M: So that's where you all are...

[klatukatt]

Lady M: *takes Katt's blaster* Guns and alcohal don't mix, sweetie.

Katt: *grabs it back* Oh, you're one to talk. *throws it out window* I'm surprized you CAN talk.

Sane: Um, Katt? There is a mob of angry penguins outside your window demanding vengence.

*ZAP!*

Sane: And now they have a blaster.

[rohirrim TR]

Rohhirous: *draws a lightsaber* an elegant weapon, of a more civilised age, not so clumsy or inaccurate as a blaster.
Penguin: you wanna bet?
rohirrous: gambling? Iam a sith lord, i own my own casino thats being installed on EDDIE
penguin: chicken
rohirrous: was that a pun?
penguin: huH?
rohirrous: well your a penguin and you called me chicken, and after i take you out with this lightsaber, you become fried penguin, which tastes just like fried chicken.
penguin: fried chicken.?...?
rohirrous: would you prefer to be beer battered?

[Acalewia]

Acalewia: Wait a minute, Rohhirous *Penguin and Rohhirous look at each other. Acalewia returns with roll of tickets*
Tickets! Tickets to see the Rohhirous vs. the Penguin! Get your tickets while they last! :D

[Curubethion]

How much for a ticket? I'll take one...after I take on the penguin:D

[Acalewia]

ummm..... 10 bucks. You and Rohhirous fighting the Penguin?

[rohirrim TR]

penguin: now hold on a minute, surely theres a diplomatic solution...
rohirrous: nope no way to get out of it now, we've sold tickets and everything.
penguin: oh *looks crestfallen(which is pretty amazing considering he's a penguin)*
rohirrous: i may have a solution *whispers to penguin*
penguin: death!!! *pulls out machete and frying pan, crazygonuts at rohirrous*
Rohirrous: *slices frying pan in half, sends lightsaber through penguin missing all vital, making it appear that he is slain, even though an hour in bacta will cure him*

[Acalewia]

Spectators: Whoa!

[klatukatt]

Spectators: Whoo! Violence!

Katt: All right everyone! Let's retire to the Sport's Bar just down the hall and you can all buy Rohirrim a drink!

Spectators: YAY!

*There is a stampeed to the bar. Katt stays behind to nurse the penguin back to health.*

Katt: Aw, who am I kidding?

*Katt kicks the penguin out of the window where it promptly explodes.*

[rohirrim TR]

rohirrous:hey what happened to the blaster the penguin's had?
*collective, Uh OH*

[The last sane person]

Darth Sane: *appears with blaster holes* THey...*gasps* took the ever full liquor cabinet! I tried to stop em, but there were to many! TO ARMS!

[rohirrim TR]

rohirrous: too many,? they only had one blaster, and your supposed to be a shadowtrooper, hey what did you do with the real darth sane?

[Acalewia]

they took the liquir cabenet!!!!!

[The last sane person]

Sane: *puts on armor and girds on light saber* You dunce, they EXPLODE! There was legions of them, how Katt managed to stuff so many in her front yard is a mystery, but never mind! To the aid of the liqour cabinet, and if any of you have exploding penguin-proof armor, i suggest you put it on.

[rohirrim TR]

rohirrous: there is the real sane. are you out of your freakin mind? you called me a dunce?

[The last sane person]

Darth Sane: You were being silly, and underestimated Human Pi's creation. I have done battle with them on numerous occasions. I am a penguin war veteran. I am very much in my mind, and I suggest you don your armor, even though we were having a peaceful *snerk* party.

*sees that the HoH army is properly armed and armored for the impending penguin sortie*

Darth Sane: Weapons at the ready! Give no quarter!

[klatukatt]

*And so the battle raged in the front yard. Lady M looked on from the roof in near disbelief at how stupid people can be.*

Katt: Yep, that sure is stupid.

Lady M: Hi Katt. I thought you were down there fighting.

Katt: I am. At least, one of my alter-egos is. Someone has to come to the aid of her fellow Sith lords.

Lady M: Which one are you?

Katt: The one with two blasters, see, behind that bush.

Lady M: I thought you had a light saber.

Katt: Well, I'm not exactly a sith lord. I am just employed by the dark side.

Lady M: Ah. Well, this is your house. When are you planning on stopping this?

Katt: When they get tired. They look like their having so much fun. *grabs her side* Ooh...

Lady M: What?

Katt: Piece of shrapnal. Boy that stings. Maybe we should end this after all.

*Down on the battlefield Katt the Alter Ego stood up and yelled:*

Katt: EVERYONE BACK INSIDE!

*Once Katt On The Roof was sure all the "good guys" were inside she took aim with a grenade launcher. The grenade soared in a high arc and landed right inside the liquor cabinet.*

BOOM

Lady M: Does this always have to happen?

Katt: I'm afraid so, m'lady.

*They walked downstairs where cries were floating up of "NO!" "NOT THE BOOZE!" "I CAN'T BE SOBER!!!"*

Katt: Ahem, don't be silly. You think I only have ONE liquor cabinet?

[rohirrim TR]

rohirrous: what it can't be over, i just called for air support, *clone gunships land* see reinforcements have arrived.
darth sane: even without the clones it was a victory.
rohirrous: victory? no... begun now, this penguin/clone war has.

[The last sane person]

Darth sane: Dammit! But that was the never-ending-supply-of-booze-cabinet!

*Rohirrous shrugs and rummages about the wreckage, clones milling around with no apperant purpose*

Darth Sane: If its a war they want, its blood and war they will get! *slices a wounded and yet unexploded penguin in half*

[rohirrim TR]

* a clone finds the liquor cabinet under a pile of feathers*
rohirrous: sucess! perhaps?, or has it been rigged to explode? better have the bomb squad check it first, *a little R4 unit rolls out run a diagnostic on the cabinet*

[Acalewia]

Acally:*rolls eyes* fighting makes me hungry. Any pizza left?

[The last sane person]

*cabinet goes BOOOOOOM. It takes the drone and 4 clones with it*

Sane:.....Erk, All the pizza we had was trod underfoot. *picks off peperoni from sole of shoe* I guess we didnt bother with putting them at the table... Oh well, shadowtroopers to me! We are off to the pizza parlor!

[rohirrim TR]

rohirrous: its probably best to keep a low profile, if you don't feel it necesarry don't kill anyone, and don't talk to penguins, :rolleyes: talk about an explosive conversation.

[klatukatt]

*And so began the quest of the Great Pizza Hunt.*

Sane: No. No more bloody quests.

*All right. So the gang went to the Pizza Parlour and ordered a bunch of stuff.*

Katt: Hold on a sec, guys. Let's see... These are all gonna be your biggest size. Three cheese, five meat lovers, two vegitarian, fifteen chopped garlic and gorgonzola--

Lady M: Katt, fifteen?

Katt: You haven't tasted this pizza. Oh, and about two hundered plain with raw herring.

*And so the gang went to the Pizza Parlour and ordered a bunch of stuff.*

Katt: You already did that one.

*Well what the hell is going on down there anyway?*

Katt: Us and the jedi and the penguins are sipping soda waiting for our pizza.

*OK. That happened. the end.*

[rohirrim TR]

rohirrous: well a temporary treaty to eat pizza was a good idea....or was it? you know a packed pizza parlor would be a terrible place to have a kamikaze penguing go off.

[Acalewia]

Acally: Shhh! Not to loud! They'll here you!

[Curubethion]

Impromptu Hardcore Time!!!
*bangs on guitar*
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!
*bangs on guitar*
*expounds on the meaning of the lyrics*

[rohirrim TR]

*penguins bow to curub's guitar*
Darth rohirrous: oh great, they think he's some kind of rock-n-roll god :eek: now. I wonder if penguins would like switchfoot?

[Curubethion]

Dare You To Mooooooooooove...

[Acalewia]

*Acally runs away screaming* AHHHHHHHHH! NOT THE SENIOR SONG!

[rohirrim TR]

Curub: Don't close your eyes
This is your life
And today is all you got now

Marvin(hitchhikers guide): it will all end in tears

Curub: uh-oh the penguins look angry

Marvin: pathetic isn't it?

Curub: they're coming AHHHH *penguins mobbing him* *drops guitar*

Marvin: *picks up guitar*
it'll be a day like this one
when the world caves in
when the world caves in
when hte world caves innn

Penguins: *Start sobbing*

Curub: *grabs guitar and heads out* hey marvin try to stop em if they try to follow us will ya? thanks buddy.

Marvin: a brain the size of a plnet and i'm supposed delay a bunch of penguins.

Penguin: get out of the way!

Marvin: Whats the point of it all?

Penguin: do i look like i care? get out of the way!

Marvin: you said it, nothing matters no one cares, and the diodes down my left side still hurt.

Penguin:@^*&^)^%%* out of the way!

* out of nowhere a POV gun lands next to Marvin*
Marvin: *SHOOTS PENGUINS WITH POV gun*

*penguins collapse in tears*

Marvin: pathetic isn't it?

[Curubethion]

Marvin: *picks up guitar*
it'll be a day like this one
when the world caves in
when the world caves in
when the world caves innn

OOC: Love it! :D

[The last sane person]

*Sane sticks two fingers in her ear and makes her way to unplug the amp*

Sane: GEEBUS! YOU JUST BLEW OUT MY EARDRUMS!

Curub: *Over the din* COOL! YOU PLAY DRUMS?

Sane: YES! WAIT! NO! What was the question?

[Rían]

Dare You To Mooooooooooove...

I dare you to lift yourself up off the floooooor ...

[The last sane person]

Sane:*rushes over and kicks Rian in the shins* No! Not that song! Tis eeevil!

Rian:*hopping on one foot* OOOW! *Starts hopping to the beat*

T*hey all start to stomp on the 90 second rule, and Curubethion wails on it with his guitar, a la Jimmy Hendrix*

[rohirrim TR]

Rohirrous: Curub! did you hear that?

Curub: what?

Rohirrous: Rian, she knows at least one line from a switchfoot song, maybe she knows who switchfoot is and doesn't hate them, you think?maybe?

Curub: nahh that might be too much to hope for. she might've heard the song on the radio.

Rohirrous: oh yeah, want some fruit snacks?

[Curubethion]

Oh! What flavor? Sour Apple? Please, Sour Apple?

[rohirrim TR]

Rohirrous: well we have bananna, grape, rasberrry, strawberry, blackberry *blackberry starts ringing* ahh but don't eat the blackberry it'd probably give you indigestion.

Curub: *monotone* sour apple, sour apple, sour apple, sour apple, sour sour apple, apple.

Rohirrous: oh yeah sure, sour apple yeah. *throws him a bag*

[klatukatt]

*Suddenly a heliocopter crashes through the celing and the entire cast of Drawn Together falls out.*

Katt: *steps out of heliocopter* woah! I went to Vegas for four days and suddenly everything has devolved into heavy metal?

*All penguins throw tomatoes at Katt*

Katt: That reminds me, I have to go make a salad.

[rohirrim TR]

rohirrous: but...don't you want some fruit snacks?

Penguins: I do! I do!....

Curub: uhh oh, dude not good, you know how much a gazillion penguins can eat?

rohirrous: hmm, well we've still got your guitar if worst comes to worst.

[The last sane person]

Sane: Yeah, heavy metal will drive these hords off like leaves on wind, especially your...er...special brand of playing.

Curub: Hey!

Sane: Did some one say fruit snacks?

[klatukatt]

Katt: Hey guys, look what I found!

*Blam, BOOM, blam, BOOM, blam, BOOM*

Katt: That was the sound of several penguins exploding after being shot. That is ALSO the sound that YOU will be making if you play any more GOD DAMN HEAVY METAL!

*And Katt did indeed have two very shiney semi-automatic handguns pointed at the musicions.*

Lady M: Katt, put the guns down.

Katt: No. Hey, maybe I won't shoot them, maybe I'll just shoot the amps!

Lady M: Katt, you can't even spell. You shouldn't be holding a gun.

Katt: That's right, I got two. Maybe I should blow up the whole pizza place.

*She put the guns away and somehow found a ten pound bag of RICE*

Everyone: NOOOO!

[rohirrim TR]

Rohirrous: Klattukatous, how about you come over here and eat fruit snacks, thats right good, good, hears some earmuffs *hands her earmuffs*, you won't hear any rocknroll(well tecnically its alt-rock but i digress)

Katt: fruit snaks good

Sane: you spelled snacs WRONG!!

Katt: *sticks tounge out at Sane* your mouth is moving but all I hears is ....

[klatukatt]

Katt: Ah. You have sedated me. Wait, that's brilliant! LET'S ROCK AND ROLL!

Stereo:
Tweny tweny twenty four
hours to go,
I wanna be sedated!
Nothin to do,
no way to go home,
I wanna be sedated!
Just put me in a wheelchair
get me to the show
hurry hurry hurry
before I lose control
I can't control my fingers
I can't control my toes
oh no no no
OH NO!

Katt: YAY Ramones! *sleeps*

OOC: I'm really out of it today.

[rohirrim TR]

rohirrous: sedated huh? well if you say so...*gives her 3 drowsy dramamines*
ok that should do it.

Katt: but i'm not seasik i'm fine i'm, whoa i'm really tired *stagers away and collapses on the couch*

Sane: you spelled seasick rong!!

Katt: *mumbles something in her sleep that suspiciously sounds like* shut up you wanna be sellin i mean spellin teacherZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

[Lady Marion Magdalena]

Sane: I must commit Sepuku! you made me spell "Wrong" Wrong!

Rohirrous: Oh...well...yeah...

Sane: Or I could just give you the boot....

[rohirrim TR]

rohirrous: er..well don't worry sepuku with a lightsaber won't hurt a bit, in fact we might even be able to save you a couple of hours in bacta would probably cure you.

[rohirrim TR]

rohirrous: heres some christmas kandy *hands sane some red and green m&ms*

Sane: you spelled candy wrong rong wong W R O N G!!

Rohirrous:er...I suppose that means no?

[The last sane person]

*Sane did grin and accepted the candy*

Sane: Nah, I like it, and I am not that big of a spelling Nazi.

[klatukatt]

Katt: AAAAAAAA NAZZIS!

*Katt Yawns*

Katt: Wow, it's a bit early. Anyone need a hangover cure? Boy I;m hungry, what tiem is it? Has anyone seen my coffee?

*Everyone throws pillows at Katt.*

Sane: Go back to sleep!

Rohirrous: Jezze, who gave HER caffeen?

[rohirrim TR]

rohirrous: er....katt your sig is disturbing, how could you have quit EDDIE you hardly got started?!

[klatukatt]

Katt: I'm tempermental like that. But, you are the first person that has noticed my leave of absence.

*Katt pulls out a light saber.*

Katt: The REAL reason I left is that I was in training to become a Sith Lord. I will now proudly take my place on EDDIE once again.

*Katt cuts up her signature with the light saber.*

Katt: See? I got skillz now.

[The last sane person]

Sane: The prodigal daughter returns. I see you have done some training. Under whom?

[klatukatt]

Katt: I took an online class. Ha! It was easy.

[rohirrim TR]

Rohirrous: you found a sith holocron those are real antiques, that would be worth some real credits to the EMPIRE.

[klatukatt]

Welcome back to the greatest party in five universes and twenty realities! I'm your host, Black Whole, here with my buddy StrangTheroy. How you doin' tonight, Strang?

I'm feelin good, Black. We have some fine party animals in the house, and I don't just mean the penguins. Let's see who can shake their STRING on the dance floor!

Wow! That was a really bad pun! Let's go for it!

*Katt runs in starts playing loudly on the tuba. BLORT BLAT BLLLLANNNG!*

Katt: *sings* Yeah! You're my baby, my sweet pattoose! Kiss me like a hippopotamouse! Yeah baby! I treat you so nice! Make you feel just like Condi Rice!

*Katt plays tuba: BLORT BLAT PHFFFFF!!!! until she falls over: THUMP.*


Wow, that was unspeakably bad. That goes to a whole-nother-dimention of horrific.

I'd have to aggree with you, but let's go to the judges. I see a two, a one, and a square root of negative twenty-one. That brings her total down to 4i. Good on those imaginary numbers.